Sister Spirit

My sister woke me up early today. She wasn’t here. She was 25 miles away at her own house. But I knew she was awake. I could feel the sister spirit  prompting us to get ready for the day. Today Kaye takes her mother-in-law to the Trinity Nursing Home. She is nearly 96 years old and sadly lost her husband about 2 years ago. She is a remarkable woman. She isn’t on any medication and as Kaye has said, walks around like the energizer bunny.

She just doesn’t remember. She remembers some of the old times. She remembers how to smile. She has a delightful sweet spirit and an infectious laugh. She doesn’t remember to turn off the stove. She doesn’t remember how to get home. She will forget to eat if someone doesn’t assist in setting out the meal.

We had to place our mother in a Nursing Home. I prefer the name “assisted living facility”. Nursing homes can carry negative memories for many people. Assisted living sounds more pleasant. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what you call it, it is a place to go where you can be loved and safe-but it is away from your home where you nested for decades.

Maybe if this was the first time Kaye had to do this, the sister spirit wouldn’t have gotten me up so early. They don’t go until around 10. But Kaye will not just be taking Marion to Trinity. She will be taking mom. Every memory of the broken, confused expression when you take them to their new room will come flooding back. The words ” I want to go home” will thunder around her heart.

The sister spirit knows, she just knows. I wish I could explain it. I wish I could package it and give it to everyone. But I don’t know exactly what it is. I just know it surrounds us and comforts us and encourages us. It tells us how the other is doing. If one of us is struggling, the other feels anxious. So, she woke me up early. Today is a day that will take extra-ordinary grace and strength. I had to be awake to comfort Kaye.

I will go to work. Kaye will go to Trinity. Twins-who else can be in two different places and yet be together at the same time?

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